Goodbyes are tough, emotional things. I wasn’t prepared for this one. I don’t think anyone could be. Think about it. It’s a bodily function that you’ve just always done. The pain from Crohn’s Disease had already taught me never to take a satisfying, healthy poop for granted, but I don’t think there is a way to mentally and emotionally wrap one’s head around the thought of never doing it again.
If you’ve been reading along, you know that at this point I was so sick I could barely eat. My colon was riddled with sores, so passing anything was extremely painful. I was upset walking into that bathroom. It was a bitter and emotional time. And then, true to Crohn’s, it hurt like a bitch. I was sad to end things on a painful note like that. I was angry that it hurt. I was angry at how unfair all of it was. A part of me was hurting me and there was nothing I could do to change it or save myself. I just had to let go. I had to say goodbye.
So next time you go to the bathroom, enjoy it for those of us that can’t.
Dead on baby!