Post-Handshake Hand Holder – The Worst Person Ever

Post-Handshake Hand Holder, Hoot Deconstructed, Worst Person Ever, Handshake Etiquette, Handshake

Maybe this one is just a Midwestern occurrence, but this violation of handshake etiquette kills me. I’m not a big physical contact guy. Like my trust, physical contact has to be earned. But there are people out there who do this. It feels so creepy and violating.

My fiancé once told me that one of her least favorite songs is Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond. She is particularly creeped out by the line “hands touching hands, reaching out, touching me, touching you”. She cringes at that the way others cringe at the word “moist”. And now every time this happens to me, it’s all I think about. Ick.